Metro Opens Doors; Doors Open for Jim Zorn

So, what stop should I get off at to go to the Spy Museum? Belichick told me it's awesome.

Jim Zorn was in the house on Halloween to get his drink on, mingle with admirers, and talk strategy with the Metro. Zorn threw a challenge flag during beer pong, but there was inconclusive evidence to overturn the call that his elbow was over the line when he released the ball. He also carried around a game plan for Monday's showdown with Shitsburgh -- Zorn's nickname, not mine -- which was only 699 pages shorter than Al Saunders' playbook:

1. Defense! Defense! Defense!
2. Give the ball to Portis
3. Coooooley
4. Go deep with Moss and Randle El
5. NO TURNOVERS!!!

The man keeps it simple, much like Coach Janky Spanky.

I'd normally hesitate to reveal the Skins' plans for the Steelers, but they're hardly a secret. After all, Ben Roethlisberger was in the house too, trying hard to avert his eyes from the cheerleader stretching in the bathroom line.

Hip, hip...

Around 2, the Zornstar headed to the Metro, demanding that I post photos from the night on Facebook. He promised a win Monday in return. With a game plan like Zorn's, the Redskins can't lose.

You think they'll hold that train for me?