Stick to Movies, Gheorge

Former Washington Bullets 7-foot-7 center Gheorge Muresan -- You the man! You the man! -- was on the Doc Walker Show yesterday, marking the first time in the illustrious history of the program that a guest was more difficult to listen to than Doc himself.

Muresan was promoting a book he co-authored/endorsed that will be released this weekend, The Boy's Fitness Guide: Expert Coaching For the Young Man Who Wants to Look and Feel His Best. Muresan spoke to Doc about the challenge of getting kids off their fat, Twinkie-eating asses and outside to exercise. To paraphrase Muresan's message: "Kids these days just want to play video games all day. Sports aren't necessarily for everyone, but kids need to be getting exercise. My kids don't have video games. I tell them 'If you want to play, I'll play with you. If you want to get video games, I'll get you video games.' But they don't have video games." (One can only wonder how Gheorge's hand-eye coordination would have benefited from a little Mario Brothers action.)

If Gheorge's interview with Doc was any indication, this book won't motivate kids to put down the Playstation controller. One of the many brilliant nutrition tips included in the book that Muresan was kind enough to share on the show was -- spoiler alert! -- "avoid junk food." Another was "watch your rations." The longer the interview went on, the more I had to resist the urge to drive into oncoming traffic. (I could have also changed the station, but the conversation was equal parts mesmerizing and mind-numbing). Look, I'm all for fitness education and it's good to see one of my favorite Bullets joining the cause, but if you're going to write a book for boys on the subject, tell them something they don't know.

The following is from the free excerpt on Amazon.com:

Physical fitness is a way of life -- a commitment to exercise, eat right, and care for your body.

Being fit has many rewards. Your body is healthy and strong. Your weight is proportional to your height. You feel good about yourself. You're alert, able to think clearly. And you look your best.

I'm pretty sure that the first sentence would be easier to read if it were written in Romanian. Muresan will be autographing copies of the book at Tysons Corner this weekend, so put down that ice cream and get out there. The book could make a nice stocking stuffer this holiday season, if only for the fact that the cover includes the unintentionally hilarious phrase "endorsed by NBA Star Gheorge Muresan."

Movie star? Maybe. NBA star? Not so much.